How annoyed am I with the Gladstone Theatre?  Why, lemme tells ya!  I’d been hearing rumblings and rumours about their upcoming season launch for about a month or so now…I was all psyched up and ready to get the invite for the launch event, head on out, rub elbows with the hoi polloi, and best of all…FREE FOOD!  Ah, I could hardly wait.

But then..!  They figured it out, the terrible secret!  It turns out you can just e-mail that business out to the exact same effect, and then you are no longer obliged to feed do-nothing mooches like me!  Oh, woe…guess I have to go grocery shopping this week AFTER all.

But there ends my whining,because that e-mail was some of the best news I’ve received in a good long while.  Not only is the Gladstone back next season, this time with a FULL yearlong schedule, but there are now four participating companies on the roster, and the show list is, quite frankly, to die for.  After a couple of shorter seasons, the Gladstone gang seems ready and raring to knock this next one out of the park.  Check it out:

STONES IN HIS POCKETS by Mary Jones, from Seven Thirty Productions.  Directed by 730 kingpin John P.Kelly, and featuring the dynamic duo of Richard Gelinas and Zach Counsil, this Irish play kicks off the new season on September 7th.

HOW IT WORKS by Daniel MacIvor, from Plosive Productions.  Directed by Stewart Matthews, there’s really never anything wrong with more Danny Mac in the lineup.  And I’ve even read this one!  October 5-20.

NOVEMBER by David Mamet, from Seven Thirty.  After Plosive’s raucous take on SPEED-THE-PLOW , John P. steps up to take his own crack at the Mamet, and I can’t wait.  November 21st to December 8th.

MIRACLE ON 34th STREET: THE RADIO PLAY, adapted by Teri Loretto-Valentik and John Cook from the book by Valentine Davies, from Plosive.  Radio Gladstone is back again, with this take on the Xmas classic from director Nicole Milne.  Features some family-friendly matinees on weekends!  December 14-23.

DOCTOR HORRIBLE, based on Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog by Joss Whedon, Zack Whedon, Maurissa Tancharoen and Jed Whedon, music by Joss Whedon and Jed Whedon.  Directed by Dave Dawson for Black Sheep Theatre (a gang that know their way around a musical), this just rocketed to the top of everyone’s must-see list for 2013.  Have a friend who claims they’re ‘not into theatre’?  THIS is the show to drag them too and prove’em wrong.  January 16-Feb 2.

*UPDATE* …But not really!  Tragic and long-needed update, there will be no DOCTOR HORRIBLE show in the Gladstone’s season.  Some mukkity-muk about rights and all that, boo.  It has been replaced in the roster with BAT BOY THE MUSICAL, which Katie Hood tells me is a bag full of awesome in its own right, so there.  How dare you argue with KAtie Hood??  I’ll moider ya!

BILLY BISHOP GOES TO WAR by John Gray with Eric Peterson, from Plosive.  From director extraordinaire Teri Loretto-Valentik, and starring the inimitable Chris Ralph in multiple roles, this Canuck classic is gonna be a gooder.  February 8-23.

ABSURD PERSON SINGULAR by Alan Ayckbourn, from Seven Thirty.   John P. again, with this comedy from the writer whose play HOW THE OTHER HALF LOVES opened the Gladstone theatre a few years back.  March 5-23.

THE TAMING OF THE SHREW by Wm.Shakespeare, from Bear and Company.  Eleanor Crowder’s ubiquitous new company makes its Gladstone debut with one of Billy Shakes’ killer comedies to close out the season.  Crowder knows her Shakespeare, and I suspect this show will prove that all over again.   April 19-May 4.

All that, PLUS we can expect other announcements along the way, from companies like Phoenix Players, and maybe more.  The Gladstone is carving out a very special niche for itself in the Ottawa Theatre scene, and I couldn’t be giddier about it.  Can’t wait for the new season…and while I’m at it, congrats on an amazing season just wrapping up now, with DEATH AND THE MAIDEN.  More power to you, Gladstone, and I look forward to many exciting years to come.

But seriously, snacks next time, okay?  I’m starving over here.  Peace, love and soul,

The Visitor (and WInston)